College-going girl found in Salmiya apartment
‘I am old enough to take care of myself, free to live my life’
KUWAIT CITY, Feb 13: A Kuwaiti man was shocked when he discovered that his daughter was not enrolled at the Faculty of Police and soon filed a missing persons report on her at a local police station, reports Al-Rai daily.
In his complaint the man said all this while he believed his daughter was a student of the faculty.
Police later found the 26-year-old daughter holed inside an apartment in Salmiya.
However, she refused to return to her parents on grounds she is old enough to take care of herself and is free to live her life the way she wants
In Kuwait it’s not the norm for Kuwaiti men to live outside their parents’ home if they are not married and it is certainly unusual to find Kuwaiti women living on their own.
I’m sure there are many cases of unmarried Kuwaitis living on their own and apart from their families for a variety of reasons but it is hardly acceptable. If a man does it, he may be regarded as a person who wants his own space to entertain the kinds of people he cannot invite to his family home. This may not be the case. The man may simply desire his own personal space for any number of normal acceptable reasons. However, there is a stereotype attached.
In any case, stereotype or not, society will turn a blind eye and forgive males for indulging in any behaviour that is not the norm but heaven forbid should it be a woman. She would be immediately stigmatized for life even if for perfectly sane and normal reasons, she wanted her own place to live the life she is entitled to choose.
In the situation above, it is not exactly acceptable that the young woman had to lie to her parents about her whereabouts. However, this behavior shows how most people in our society bend the truth till it is crooked in order to get what they want instead of acting upfront and being who they are. It is important for us to accept the differences in our family members and our friends and not to pressure them into being someone they are not. Otherwise be prepared to discover many stories of double lives.
I think it’s partly the women’s fault, especially in our region. I’ve noticed more than once that women “expect” men to help them, pamper them and generally act like “gentlemen” with them. e.g. giving up a bus seat for a woman.
This kind of behavior, especially when excessive like here in Qatar, gives people the idea that women “need” men to protect them.
Of course not all women do that, but enough of them do to paint that picture.
Hi Jesus,
It’s no one’s fault per se
It’s a cultural thing – women living alone outside the family home is not approved of by society in general. If a woman does live alone, she is more susceptible to male harassment if she does not have a partner.
One young widower I knew of had her brother live with her in her house (along with her young children). This was to protect her reputation and also as a means of security I suppose for her
I think its fine and okay that the girl wanted a place of her own. It shows how independent she wants to be.
In a western society, her action would have been more than acceptable, but with a society like ours? Yeah no comment.
Some Kuwaiti women do live on their own when studying or working abroad that is true. Others of course are accompanied by either parent (if the female is not married)
I do think it is fun to live together in the family home. However, sometimes the personal views and lifestyles of sons and daughters clash with those of the parents and it really should be ok for them to be able to choose to live separately.
I know it isn’t what you folks do but here once someone is 18 they are free to move anywhwere they want. It seemed odd to me to move back in with my parents when I was 23 and I couldn’t work fast enough to get back out on my own.Is a woman free to arm herself in your culture like we are here?
HI Chris
What do you mean to arm herself? As in firearms? lol I wouldn’t know but I’m sure any weapons would have to be licensed
For a young unmarried woman to go off and live on her own in our society would be making a very bold statement In a conservative society like ours, the family (tribe) is an important part of a person’s identity. By living separately, one is saying that those affiliations are not important.
Of course it is not a catastrophe if someone lives away from the family home; but people will always think that there is a conflict of interest.
In addition, our houses in Kuwait are large and it is quite comfortable for people to live in the same place.
Yes firearms is what I wa sasking about.When one lives on their own it’s a good idea to be able to protect yourself not everyone in the world is a good person.
You’re right about that Chris but I hope we don’t have to start doing that here.
I wonder if there are women living in Kuwait who own firearms to protect themselves? That would be interesting to find out